Game of Thrones…it seems to be everywhere! In the past few weeks, I have been asked seemingly countless times, “Do you watch it, do you like it?” or head, “oh my gosh I can’t wait!” Not surprisingly, I just came across an article, “ Most of Game of Thrones Problems Could Be Solved With Therapy.” Perfect!
The article walks through several common struggles seen not only in the series but in therapy sessions as well. But beware dedicated fans, the article, and my reactions to it, contain some spoilers!
The article begins with a comment on the traumatic, stressful life experiences of Mad Queen Daenerys and Euron Greyjoy that are never addressed, and certainly not sober, because there “just isn’t enough time” It seems to me that analogy represents a strong parallel to what many experience in everyday life. How often have you thought about beginning therapy to start healing the pain associated with a trauma but then thought,” the kids…I’m busy…I’m afraid…I don’t want to deal with this.” So instead you avoid and, in some cases, have a drink…or two. But know that, according to the Game of Thrones, you are not alone. Know also that, in life, you are not alone.
But there is truly light, and hope, through therapy. There have been wonderful advances in the treatment of traumatic, stressful life events that incorporate meaningful integration of cognitive and body based approaches. A well trained, licensed therapist can gently and effectively help you reframe and replace negative thoughts, heal the possible physical symptoms of trauma lodged in you body, such as the pain in your back, racing heart, or knot in your stomach, and help you internalize emotional regulation strategies needed to restore calm. Through this process, the experiences of your past will no longer negatively impact your present and your future. Imagine the benefits if only you, and Mad Queen Daenerys and Euron Greyjoy, would just take that first step…together.
Moving on, the article references the highly anticipated fight between the Hound and the Mountain as resulting from years of pent up anger toward family members. How many of you have some negative emotions toward family members, or things that have remained long unsaid? Research now clearly shows that holding in, or “stuffing,” emotions has a negative impact on our physical and emotional health. Ignoring, or postponing, resolving a conflict can result in physical illness, increases in depression, anxiety and symptoms of post traumatic trauma, and (please note the Hound and the Mountain) reactive and potentially violent anger. But again, take heart! There are countless, evidence based approaches to help you strongly and empathically communicate your feelings and values to others and to quiet your anger without risking out of control impulsivity.
Overall, I found the article quite clever in the pithy presentation of example after example of ineffective behavior, and how such behavior could be much better managed through the processing and healing of feelings associated with therapy. I do truly appreciate both the timeliness and creativity of the article.
The author and I are in agreement that, at some point over the course of a lifetime, everyone belongs in therapy. I know that many still view seeking therapy as an admission of weakness or failure in some way. But in reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Sitting with a therapist represents strength; it is an opportunity to share your thoughts, to get those feelings out of your mind and body, and to hear from an objective person who will not be unduly upset by what you share. And, let’s be frank, the millions of daily posts on Facebook, Twitter, SnapChat, Tumbir or Medium suggest that most prefer to share their pain with strangers, even while professing they can go to their friends for advice. Think about it, working with a stranger who is a trained mental health professional is truly easier. You learn the skills and develop the tools to manage your thoughts, not be lead by negative emotions, and adapt your behaviors. Ultimately you learn to feel more in control, even during those situations when you have little to no control over anything.
So, show yourself and those close to you an act of kindness, consider therapy. Let’s be honest, we all know a possible alternative…..such as ignoring an enemy’s surrender and instead torching an entire city! Let’s make a better choice; decide to be proactive, seek help and work toward a kinder, gentler world.